-->
Hollow Tree Ventures parenting humor
Follow the Hollow Tree on Facebook!Follow the tweets!Let's pin together!Look! Square pictures!Google Plus us!HTV's on the YouTube, too!Subscribe via RSS feed!Get yourself some Bloglovin'!I'll send htv to your email inbox!

Kidioms - idioms rewritten for parents

Idioms - folk sayings, maxims, proverbs, whatever you want to call them - are clever little phrases that speak a universal truth.

Or at least, they used to.

Just like my ancient oven mitts, we keep using idioms because they've been around forever and they (sort of) get the job done - but unfortunately, many of them have lost their usefulness over time. They've simply gotten a bit outdated; sure, "a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush," but how is that relatable? I buy my birds in the frozen meat section and they're worth about $2.97 per pound.

I know, that idiom isn't supposed to be about literally catching birds, but I'm a MOM - I don't have time to decipher what my kids are saying with their mouths full of Fruit Roll-Up and translate these old-timey words of wisdom into new-timey words that make sense. So, in case some of you were having the same problem, I invented Kidioms - idioms that parents can actually use.


kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV


kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV

kidioms by Robyn Welling @RobynHTV
If you got a laugh out of these, check out MORE in Kidioms Part 2 and Kidioms Part 3!


I hope you enjoyed yourself while you were here - and I hope you come back! Please share inappropriate giggles with me on Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook, or subscribe via email so you don't miss a thing!


28 comments:

Amy at Funny is Family said...

You are so clever. I would be more jealous if I didn't love you.

Susan Bristow-Mclean said...

Love these....especially the Lego one!

Abby Heugel said...

Even though I'm not a parent, I love these so much (especially the last one.)

fishducky said...

You are one sharp lady, Robyn!!

hollow tree ventures said...

I'll take that as and extra-huge compliment, because I could say the same about you! xo

hollow tree ventures said...

Thank you - and thank you for all the new friends you sent my way on The Facebook! MwwwwAH!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Hey, you don't have to be a parent to hate glitter. Glitter's an equal opportunity annoyance.

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Right back at'cha, my friend!

Jen @ Cuddles and Chaos said...

Hilarious! Lego hell and glitter are definitely my favorites--- which tells you an awful lot about life in this house.

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Thank you! And thanks for making me feel less alone - life in your house sounds a lot like life here, where I was recently poked in the eye with a metallic fish sticker.

Toulouse said...

Damn you're clever! I want all of trees framed!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

And hung in the kids' rooms!

Abandoning Pretense said...

This is so creative and clever! I love it! Must share!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Thank you so much - for the kind words *and* the sharing!

Christie said...

Hahahaha! Glitter, the bane of my existence! I actually make sure I have Sweets use glitter in all her handmade cards (don't judge) so that I can share the love of glitter. I pinned that one- love it!

rorybore said...

The Lego one is an absolute truth!
and oh good lawd the glitter....and it's not JUST glitter now....they have glitter GLUE! thanks ever so much.
I also like Cry Over Spilt Milk.....or, at least I hope that is what is stuck all over my kitchen floor!! Did it move? I think it moved....

Karen said...

Very VERY funny! Love it!

CJ Page said...

Glitter + Glue = the herpes of craft supplies!

Her Royal Thighness said...

I especially love Nap Time Flies and Cleanliness is Next to Impossible. Clever!

Her Royal Thighness said...

I especially love Nap Time Flies and Cleanliness is Nest to Impossible. So Clever!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Truth!!!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Thanks for the share - and for *not* sending me a glitter card (that's completely hilarious when you do it to *other* people, though)!

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

They had to mix glitter into the glue, because glitter doesn't already get into EVERYTHING and stick there forever. Oh, wait... Never mind, I'm not sure why they thought we needed glitter glue.

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Thank you! :D

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

You sure know how to make a girl feel appreciated, Nikki! Thanks for sharing, by the way - your Facebook intro made me snort. xoxo

Robyn of HollowTreeVentures said...

Thanks much!

Samantha said...

Those are soooo true!

JD @ Honest Mom said...

HA! Those are great. You make me giggle every time!

Post a Comment

Thank you for commenting - you're awesome! I mean, even if you're a jerk, at least it means you read my blog. RIGHT?!?