Hollow Tree Ventures parenting humor
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Felt Food Frenzy

It wasn't all  my fault - the mess started with the kids' art projects.  They're just like me, in the sense that in order to get into a proper Creative Mood, they have to get out every arts and crafts supply ever manufactured in the history of the human race.  There's something about having everything you might possibly want to use right there in front of you, all within arm's reach, that makes you want to whip up the next Mona Lisa (of course, our masterpieces end up looking more like a Picasso).

These items get stacked in ever-growing heaps as one of the kids thinks of "just one more thing" they could use on their creations, until there are cotton balls scattered around in the watercolor paints, torn construction paper is marinating in a pool of glue with the pipe cleaners, and the whole mess is held together with lengths of mangled, discarded double-sided tape.  Maddie watched with interest over the weekend as the pile of art supplies grew.

When our house reached Maximum Mess Factor we went to my Mom's (hey, we inherited the Craft Mountain Gene from her, so I didn't feel too badly about extending our river of Popsicle sticks and glitter over to her place), where the kids started new projects.  Zoe filled a rolling cart with "only the necessities," which translates to "the cart was so full the casters nearly snapped off."  Her supplies included several 3-D flower stickers, which she had  to have to jazz up her drawing of the American flag.  Apparently the current flag design isn't quite fancy enough for her taste.

I guess my point is that my house is a wreck, but my own Craft-Stacking this weekend was only partly to blame.  I was innocently flipping through a toy catalog and saw some play food made out of felt.  That was all it took.  I bet I could make that,  I thought.  It was the beginning of the end.

It started with just a sandwich - I'll make a toy sandwich for Zoe.  That's all.  I'll give it to her for her birthday.  See?  It's practical!  All I need to get out is the felt.  Well, some scissors, too.  And thread.  And the sewing machine.  Several hours later...

Of course, before long Zoe found me out and was frothing at the mouth to play with the sandwich - so much for the birthday surprise, I thought.  But wait, I could make MORE felt food, and then it would be a surprise again!  Great idea.  I'll make more sandwich stuff.  And strawberries.

And popcorn.  And potato chips.  In a felt chip bag.

By the time I decided to make a bunch of cookies, the dining room table was overrun with every imaginable color of felt, snips of thread, and half-finished felt food projects, and the sewing machine had been relocated to the floor, so I had to move the operation out to the living room (much to Gerry's delight).  I even had to make a trip to the store to get more  felt and stuffing.  "Exactly how much more of this stuff are you planning to make," was a question I heard more than once, as I mounded my supplies onto the coffee table.

"Just one more thing," was frequently the reply.  After all, if Zoe can serve lunch and snacks and dessert, she has to be able to serve breakfast.

"Mommy has spent more time making fake food this weekend than she's spent making real  food in the past two months," Gerry commented casually to Maddie.  I would have argued that point, but I was busy making felt food.  Plus, it was probably true.

"But Maddie loves watching the sewing machine," I said in my defense.  See, I'm doing it for the children, not entirely to satisfy my own current freakish craft obsession.  Right?!?  Gerry had to agree that Maddie does seem to enjoy it, as he let her lean closer and closer to the spool of thread she so desperately wanted to eat in a good-natured (and unsuccessful) effort to put the brakes on my felt food production.

I wish I could say I was finished making Zoe's felt food banquet - she might need some veggies, though.  I also wish I could say I was going to clean up my craft-splosion sometime soon.  All I can say is that I'm lucky to have a patient husband, who tolerates my ever-changing (but always messy) craft obsessions with a smirk and a shake of the head.  There's a possibility I'll have to join some Crafters Anonymous group to help me stop.  That's okay, I can supply the snacks for the meetings.

I hope you enjoyed yourself while you were here - and I hope you come back! Please share inappropriate giggles with me on Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook, or subscribe via email so you don't miss a thing!


Anonymous said...

Yet one more acorn that hasn't fallen far from the tree.

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