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Hollow Tree Ventures parenting humor
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As The Dollhouse Turns - Under Arrest

Episode 7: Under Arrest

Last time, on As The Dollhouse Turns, the girls were just returning from a night on the town...

Always alert to the obvious (and still temporarily deaf), Maggie ask/screams, "HEY, WHY IS THERE A COP AT YOUR DOOR, SUNNY?"

"Just back up," Betty suggests. "They probably haven't
even noticed us yet."

Sunny freezes, and the past few weeks of potentially illegal activity flash before her eyes.
She stole a few grapes the last time she was at the grocery store... but that probably wasn't it. She'd removed the DO NOT REMOVE tag from her mattress, let the baby watch a few episodes of South Park on Buzz's iPad while she took a shower, and left a pretty nasty note on a car that was improperly parked across two handicapped spaces at Target, but she didn't think those were punishable offenses.
Well, maybe that last one... she suddenly regretted writing the note directly on  the car. With her key.
Hmmmmmm...

Okay, the police probably aren't here because of me,  Sunny thinks. But why, then?

Interrupting Sunny's musings, Maggie pipes up from the back seat. "HEY, I KNOW THAT OFFICER. HE'S THE LEAD INVESTIGATOR IN JIMMY'S CASE! I SHOULD PROBABLY GET OUT AND SAY HELLO." Maggie drunkenly fumbles for the door handle.

"I'm on it," Betty reassures Sunny. Using the training she received before getting kicked out of the Navy Seals, in one swift motion Betty leaps over the second row of seats and tackles Maggie. Together, they barrel roll silently out of the car and into the bushes - and disappear into the night.

Sunny barely notices. She can't shake the funny feeling she got when Maggie mentioned Jimmy. Surely his disappearance couldn't have anything to do with cops being at her  house. Could it?

She's so deep in thought, she almost runs into a second officer as they simultaneously reach the front door.

Sunny takes care not to slip on the oddly shiny lawn.
She wouldn't want to spill the contents of her purse right here in front of the po-po.

"Um, good evening, officers," Sunny says, silently cursing herself. Why does she always accidentally use a fake British accent when she's trying to sound casual and sober in front of authority figures?

The investigator stops taking notes on his clipboard and introduces himself. "Evening, ma'am. I'm Detective White."

The female officer impatiently jangles her handcuffs. "This is him," she says, cuffing Buzz.

"Tell them it isn't true, Sunny!" Buzz implores as he's dragged toward a waiting police cruiser.

"Wipe that smirk off your face, mister," says the officer,
who's also smiling brightly for no particular reason.

"What's going on?" Sunny demands to know. She's torn; on the one hand she's wild with concern for Buzz, but on the other hand she's suddenly really looking forward to a night without his snoring.

"Let's step inside," suggests the detective. "I have some questions for you."

"Ma'am, how long have you been gone, exactly?"

"Your husband is under arrest for committing assault in a nightclub earlier this evening, and then fleeing the scene," Detective White explains.

"Wait..." Sunny says, distracted momentarily by the sight of her fully clothed baby on the training potty, "this doesn't have anything to do with Jimmy Hulk?"

"Um, no... Should it?" The detective narrows his eyes at Sunny.

"Oh, never mind." Sunny's attention snaps back to the detective. "Of course not. I'm sorry, I'm just confused - I must be in shock." The charges against Buzz finally sink in. "This just can't be true," she protests. "Buzz was home all night, taking care of the children!"

The detective glances around the room and raises an eyebrow in disbelief. "Yes, we'll also be reporting him for neglect."

Suddenly Sunny realizes what must've happened. "No, this is all a misunderstanding - I was at that nightclub - I saw the whole thing!" Excitedly, she tells him the story of meeting the mysterious stranger who looks just like Buzz (except for the shirt color) and reveals that it was him  who started the bar fight.

---FLASHBACK---

"That's an interesting story, ma'am. But your husband gave the arresting officer his name and address before he ran off. That was the same arresting officer who IDed him just now and took him to lockup. If you're telling me this other guy's a stranger, how'd he know your husband's name and where he lives?"

At first, Sunny is puzzled.

Then she knows exactly what she needs to do.

"Stay here with the kids until the sitter arrives, would ya?" she calls over her shoulder to the detective as she runs back to her car.

From the road she calls her usual babysitter, Beatrice, who's used to getting random calls from Sunny in the middle of the night and agrees to come right over.

Minutes later, Sunny reaches her destination. At the door, she quickly gathers her courage - she has a uneasy feeling that she's not going to like everything she's about to hear.

"Liquid courage is still courage,"
she assures herself.

What is Sunny's big plan?
Where is she? WTH? And why is she bogarting all the wine?
The excitement continues next time! Until then, please feel free to catch up on previous episodes of As The Dollhouse Turns. For even more drama, click the banner below - your vote gets me all emotional!

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34 comments:

  1. I love this series! I look forward to every episode :) Liquid courage, ha ha ha.....

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    1. Thanks, I love to hear that - they're fun to do, but a lot MORE fun when I know people like reading them. :)

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  2. I'M FRUSTRATED!! Why has this not been published? I want to read the book!!!

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    1. Believe me, when it's published in a book you'll know, probably due to the tremors you'll feel from me jumping up and down. ;)

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  3. I loved seeing the contents of her purse. And the negelctful state of the house. Hilarious!

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    1. Thanks! The home's interior was based on my house in real life, as were the contents of the purse.

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  4. Aaargh! Another cliffhanger. How am I supposed to last until the next episode? I need answers now! NOW!

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    1. I don't want to give too much away, but she's at a place and things are going to happen. CRAP! I've said too much!

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  5. Photos are HILARIOUS! And the cops, oops I mean police car headlights are a great touch!

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    1. Thanks! (I'll have to give my husband credit for the headlight idea.) :)

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  6. I'm looking forward to when these come out on DVD so we can hear the behind the scenes commentary.

    P.S. If I have already left a comment like this in the past I apologize. Let's just say I have a lot of liquid courage right now.

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    1. No worries - I have a lot of liquid courage going on in the director's cut, too.

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  7. I'm hooked to the drama! Can't wait for the next episode! :) Detective White...too funny!

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    1. Thanks! I was going to say, "If only my own life were so exciting," but I don't think I want this kind of excitement. ;)

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  8. Wow why did Betty tackle Maggie what does she know ??? hmmm you really leave wandering minds wandering Robyn another super episode I had to change my blog so this is Janice aka one of your biggest fans LOL

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    1. Thanks so much - so glad you're here, in whatever form. ;)

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  9. Ahhhhhh! I have to know what happened. Get back in your writing room, corner, shed, and get started on the next episode!

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    1. It actually IS the corner of a shed - how did you know???

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  10. Ok, I totally just commented under my husband's profile. I was too excited to remember to sign out. I stand by my previous comment though.

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    1. I just love you more and more - why must our husbands insist on having profiles and using the computer? I do that all the time.

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  11. I giggled over the fact that in the face of his arrest, she was looking forward to a snoreless night's sleep. Awesome!

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    1. Tee hee - hey, some moms take peace and quiet however they can get it, eh?

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  12. This was so funny. I am looking at my daughter's doll house in the corner right now, and with great suspicion. All the dolls are naked, Ken is missing his head, and the pool is in Barbies' bedroom while the Jeep is in the kitchen.
    They are definitely up to something. :)

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    1. I'd keep my eye on them if I were you! Sounds like some serious shenanigans going on there, although the dolls being naked, I'm pretty sure, is totally normal. The only way these dolls escasped a similar fate was by having theirs painted on.

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  13. Oh how I love these! You're really getting creative with all the lighting too. Can't wait to see what next week brings!

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    1. Thanks so much! Believe me, the lighting is all my husband and my mom - whenever that's left to me you end up with blurry, dimly-lit hazy photos or pics with a flash so bright they might've been taken on the surface of the sun. ;)

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  14. Oh my gosh...I can't believe I've never read this series before. I just read half of this aloud to my husband, and it's just what we needed to forget about how I drunkenly ran into some cars today and keyed a car and drank more to cover up my affairs and then got involved in bar fight...
    You need to publish one of those fake children's books that are really for adults. These posts are hilarious!

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    1. Thanks, Ang! The key is to be able to relate to some parts (booze in the purse, kids writing on the walls, etc) but maybe not others (because stealing grapes is wrong).

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  15. 'Mommy is a doo doo'? Oddly shiny lawn? And why IS she bogarting all that wine?
    I can only imagine you are having as much fun writing this as we are reading it

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    1. I'm so glad you're having fun, too - it would be a shame (and a little crazy) to keep doing this solely for my own amusement. ;)

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  16. I'm on the edge of my seat. The baby is on the edge of my lap. The cat is on the edge of the couch. Can't wait for the next episode!

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    1. That sounds dangerous! Hang on, the next one's coming soon!

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  17. I need a babysiter that is totally OK with random middle of the night phone calls. They probably charge too much money though. Brilliant!

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    1. Me too - and one that not only doesn't charge too much, but will also do my laundry while I'm gone. I mean, as long as I'm dreaming, right???

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Thank you for commenting - you're awesome! I mean, even if you're a jerk, at least it means you read my blog. RIGHT?!?