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Hollow Tree Ventures parenting humor
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March Photo Challenge 1: up


If you look up in our dining room, on top of the china hutch (which contains no china, so I should probably just call it a hutch) is a tiny Space Shuttle.  Why?  you may ask.  Is it a child's toy, left unattended and subsequently stepped on, causing foot injury, and so it was placed high atop the hutch for safekeeping?  Is it an extremely valuable antique, displayed with prominence in hopes of inspiring jealousy and awe in all who behold it?  Is your dining room under exploration by tiny astronauts?  

No, but those are all excellent guesses.  Actually, it was placed there by my husband.  He has a genetic disorder which causes him to leave random objects in arbitrary places for his own amusement.

He inherited this condition from his father (who to this day CLAIMS HE DIDN'T PLANT CORN IN OUR FLOWER BED WHILE WE WERE OUT OF TOWN BUT WE KNOW YOU DID).  Because of this rare affliction, which as far as I know has only manifested itself in this one particular family and probably warrants further scientific study, I have been surprised by the following:
  • an ancient pack of Tramps brand cigarettes placed in a decorative wall cabinet in our entryway, so that it's now one of the first things guests see when they enter our home
  • a creepy plastic doll face from a doll-making kit found on the gear stick in my car (the hands and feet were hanging from the radio knobs)
  • a freakishly life-like garden statue of a squirrel perched on the windowsill
  • a 50-year-old can of Sour Puss sweet and sour mix hidden in my medicine cabinet
  • an equally old half-empty bottle of banana liqueur mixed in with the normal booze in the liquor cabinet
  • a Chia Head that looked like Shaggy from Scooby Doo (although that was years before we were married and he later claimed it was a housewarming gift, so I don't know if that counts)
These are just a few examples - frankly you never know what you're going to find around here.  And Gerry's poor sisters grew up with this behavior - a few years ago Gerry put a Garish Yellow Plastic Smiley Face On a Stick in one of his sister's bushes and she didn't even notice it  - which indicates a troubling level of desensitization, if you ask me.

While it can occasionally be a bit shocking when you do  finally notice these things (I nearly had a heart attack before I realized the squirrel wasn't real), it's actually quite an endearing quality, in a charmingly annoying kind of way.  I like it.  So now the squirrel lives on top of the hutch, too, perfectly at home next to the Space Shuttle, quietly watching over our family dinners with his freakishly life-like eyes.

Please click below and vote for me, and I promise you'll never have to endure dinner at my house under the watchful gaze of the squirrel!
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I hope you enjoyed yourself while you were here - and I hope you come back! Please share inappropriate giggles with me on Pinterest, Twitter, and Facebook, or subscribe via email so you don't miss a thing - and so I don't get all lonely. I get extra-pathetic when I'm lonely.


9 comments:

  1. Your husband sounds awesome. I mean, really, really, REALLY awesome. Like, maybe the most awesome man, brother, husband, son that ever existed on this planet or any other.

    I'm just saying.

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  2. And father. Except his dad sounds pretty cool, too.

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  3. Incidentally, that space shuttle came from the Air and Space Museum in D.C., so it's practically a real space shuttle.

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  4. That's great! Thanks for stopping by the LilyPad. Glad to be a new follower!

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  5. That's hilarious! It keep life interesting right?

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  6. That's a good way of putting it, Mommie Daze. :)

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  7. I think my ex-husband had the same affliction. There was a tiny penguin that lived on the ledge of the bathroom mirror for 3 years. I learned to love him. (The penguin. The husband had to go.)

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  8. corrin - still laughing at your comment! :)

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